I wrote this eulogy for my Mother’s funeral on December 1st, 2016.
My mom inspired everything that I composed; she is truly an angel.♥
For anyone who doesn’t know me, I am Dominique Bagnoche, Amy’s daughter. It’s likely that you do know or recognize who I am because my mom was extremely passionate about her family. Each of us is here today to honor the memory of my mother while acknowledging the precious ways she touched so many of our lives in countless different ways. She was a mother, wife, co-worker, co-founder of P.I.N.K., friend, and she took on numerous other roles.
She was strong, selfless, positive, and her presence lit up any room she entered. She loved to let people around her know how much she loved them; she always assured me that you can never tell someone “I love you” too often. It amazes me how she constantly went above and beyond to make certain she gave my brother and I the absolute best lives, no matter what sacrifices she went through in this process.
If there was anything that my mom wanted from her life, she went out and made it happen;
Whether it was marrying my father, starting a non-for-profit, being a mother and working full-time, going on a last-minute vacation, or making a trip to Saks. She was satisfied and fulfilled with life because she understood that she was in control of her own happiness.
Although, she understood and accepted that some things in her life were out of her control, like this terrible illness that claimed her presence on earth. In August of this year, she was dealt cards in life that were tough to play with. She knew that a terminal illness was in charge of what was going to happen in her body, but not her mind and spirits.
Ever since I was a young child, my mother has taught me to live every single day to the fullest and to not take any time you value and have for granted. Whether the time you value is time spent being with your friends, traveling, playing with your dogs, volunteering, spending time your significant other; it doesn’t matter as long as you are living each day the exact way you want.
It is easier said than done, yet my mom lived her whole life this way.
Before her first diagnosis with breast cancer five years ago, she lived this way. After she had won her battle with the first diagnosis, she gained a strong inspiration to make sure everyone around her lived their lives in the most fulfilling ways possible, not just being alive, but living life.
We can all find comfort in my mom’s passing because she had no regrets when reflecting back on her 49 years of life on earth.
Throughout these last few months, she couldn’t believe how many people were reaching out to her and honoring her in such kind ways. I told her that these kind acts were happening because of how much she cared for others and gave everything she could to help anyone in need. I still don’t believe she ever fully understood this because to her, helping other people was her normal daily life without her even noticing it and the way she lived, was the only way she wanted.
I can remember one night a few weeks ago laying in bed with her, and she said, “I’m happy, I truly am. Even if I try, I can’t think of a regret I would have if I died right now. I really love my life the only thing I’ll never understand is how I got so lucky with it.”
I will never forget her saying this.
Her passing can be an inspiration for each of us to take advantage of the small beautiful things life has to offer every day. My mom’s joy and true happiness for life was truly remarkable.
I know I am not alone when I say that she will be in my heart forever, but there is a hole in my heart that will always be there. I am not sure how I will cope with losing my best friend and mother. I do know I have been my mother’s little sidekick all of my life, and I hope to follow in her footsteps and become a strong woman who can face traumatic loss, just like she would want.
If I did not at least try to find something positive to come from my dear loving, positive mother’s passing, then I would not be her daughter.
As stated by Abraham Lincoln,
“All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.”
Update on what the last two months have been like since I wrote and recited this eulogy here: Two Months Later
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