My First Mother’s Day Without My Mom
It still feels odd to me that I am really writing a post about spending Mother’s Day Without My Mom. I really can’t sugarcoat this, Mother’s Day without Your Mom sucks. And I am confident that anybody who has lost their mother can agree with this statement. If you are spending mother’s day without your mom, you aren’t alone in doing so.
It is certainly hard for me to remain positive throughout the days leading up to Mother’s Day. This past week practically felt like it was impossible to go anywhere without seeing a sign about purchasing something for your mom or “show mom how much you love her” advertisements. I don’t really see this ever becoming that much easier either.
I have learned to navigate my way through the sadness of losing my mom and recognize what triggers my emotions, tears, etc. Like hearing people complain about “how annoying my mom is” or seeing moms and daughters doing something my mom and I used to love doing together.
It’s difficult to control the pain and triggers associated with Mother’s Day this year. Nonetheless, all I keep thinking about is how much it would actually hurt my mom if I were a bitter mess on Mother’s Day. Granted this is my first Mother’s Day since I lost my mom. Perhaps next year, or in 10, 20, or however many years I get to live, I will feel better about this day.
I hope it does get better, but if it doesn’t; I will still never let the memories I shared with her leave my mind,
And I will always remember how lucky I truly was to have a mom as great as her.
Just because things have changed and I cannot celebrate with her, it doesn’t mean I cannot honor the memories and love I still have with her. I know that my mom would not care how I spent Mother’s Day without her, as long as I didn’t spend it feeling sad, pessimistic, and depressed.
Anyone that has lost their mother should know and understand that you still can celebrate Mother’s Day. Do it for your mom’s, isn’t that what this day is about?
No mother likes to see her child sad.
When I am having a difficult day, I always try to remember that. Today and every other day, I strive to “live through” her in big and in little simple ways. If you have lost your mother, I am thinking of you during this mother’s day period.
Thank you for all the love always,